LDS

M. Russell Ballard, Read Full Article: “Daughters of God,” Ensign, May 2008, 108–10.

There is no role in life more essential and more eternal than that of motherhood.

I was re-reading this article today and it stood out in my mind because Elder Ballard focuses his remarks “primarily on mothers, particularly on young mothers.”

I love this story…

The ward’s singing mothers’ chorus was providing the music, and I found myself sitting alone with our six children. I have never been so busy in my whole life. I had the hand puppets going on both hands, and that wasn’t working too well. The Cheerios got away from me, and that was embarrassing. The coloring books didn’t seem to entertain as well as they should.

As I struggled with the children through the meeting, I looked up at Barbara, and she was watching me and smiling. I learned for myself to more fully appreciate what all of you dear mothers do so well and so faithfully!

I am trying.  And in the moments that I am trying hard it is so wonderful to get a little mention of appreciation from Garth (or anyone for that matter).

There is no one perfect way to be a good mother. Each situation is unique. Each mother has different challenges, different skills and abilities, and certainly different children. The choice is different and unique for each mother and each family. Many are able to be “full-time moms,” at least during the most formative years of their children’s lives, and many others would like to be. Some may have to work part-or full-time; some may work at home; some may divide their lives into periods of home and family and work. What matters is that a mother loves her children deeply and, in keeping with the devotion she has for God and her husband, prioritizes them above all else.

I have come to learn that mothers are all different. Children are all different. I have been very blessed to be able to work in my home during nap time and/or after bed time.  I love Gracie and Ainsley with all my heart! I love Garth with all my heart!  I am constantly learning the balancing act of prioritizing my family.  I have always found that when I keep my priorites in order I get more accomplished in the day, my kids behave better, and I am a happier person.

I am impressed by countless mothers who have learned how important it is to focus on the things that can only be done in a particular season of life. If a child lives with parents for 18 or 19 years, that span is only one-fourth of a parent’s life. And the most formative time of all, the early years in a child’s life, represents less than one-tenth of a parent’s normal life. It is crucial to focus on our children for the short time we have them with us and to seek, with the help of the Lord, to teach them all we can before they leave our homes. This eternally important work falls to mothers and fathers as equal partners. I am grateful that today many fathers are more involved in the lives of their children. But I believe that the instincts and the intense nurturing involvement of mothers with their children will always be a major key to their well-being. In the words of the proclamation on the family, “Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children” (“The Family: A Proclamation to the World,” Liahona, Oct. 2004, 49; Ensign, Nov. 1995, 102).

My mother has always said, “there is a time and season for everything”. Now is my time and season to be a loving mother to my toddler girls Gracie (3.5) and Ainsley (22 months).

We need to remember that the full commitment of motherhood and of putting children first can be difficult….There are moments of great joy and incredible fulfillment, but there are also moments of a sense of inadequacy, monotony, and frustration. Mothers may feel they receive little or no appreciation for the choice they have made. Sometimes even husbands seem to have no idea of the demands upon their wives. As a Church, we have enormous respect and gratitude to you mothers of young children. We want you to be happy and successful in your families and to have the validation and support you need and deserve.

Yes! At times it is very difficult and at times motherhood is the most wonderful and easy.  Elder Ballard then asks and answers 4 questions in simple terms:

1. What can you do, as a young mother, to reduce the pressure and enjoy your family more?
   Answer: Recognize the small and simple shining moments and the joy’s of motherhood
   Answer: Do not over schedule. “Families need unstructured time when relationships can deepen and real parenting can take place. Take time to listen, to laugh, and to play together.”
   Answer: Cultivate your gifts and talents.  “Pick one or two things that you would like to learn or do that will enrich your life, and make time for them. Water cannot be drawn from an empty well.”
   Answer: Pray, Study, and Teach the gospel, “There is great power in a prayer that essentially says, ‘We are steward-parents over Thy children, Father; please help us to raise them as Thou wouldst want them raised.’”
2. What more can a husband do to support his wife, the mother of their children?
   Answer: Show extra appreciation and give more validation for what your wife does everyday. “Notice things and say thank you—often. Schedule some evenings together, just the two of you.”
   Answer: “Have a regular time to talk with your wife about each child’s needs and what you can do to help.”
   Answer: “Give your wife a “day away” now and then. Just take over the household and give your wife a break from her daily responsibilities. Taking over for a while will greatly enhance your appreciation of what your wife does.”
   Answer: Come home from work and take an active role with your family.
3. What can children, even young children, do?
   Answer: Pick up your toys, do the dishes, make your bed without being asked. Say Thank You more often.
   Answer: “Most of all, you can put your arms around your mother often and tell her you love her.”
4. What can the Church do?
   Know them and be wise in what you ask them to do at this time in their lives. Alma’s counsel to his son Helaman applies to us today: “Behold I say unto you, that by small and simple things are great things brought to pass” (Alma 37:6).

I hope all of you dear sisters, married or single, never wonder if you have worth in the sight of the Lord and to the leaders of the Church. We love you. We respect you and appreciate your influence in preserving the family and assisting with the growth and the spiritual vitality of the Church. Let us remember that “the family is central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children” (“The Family: A Proclamation to the World”). The scriptures and the teachings of the prophets and apostles help all family members to prepare together now to be together through all eternity. I pray that God will continually bless the women of the Church to find joy and happiness in their sacred roles as daughters of God.